Back in the Game

There's nothing like a good swift kick in the ass to get you going in the right direction again. I've been so obsessed by my lovelife recently (or lack of it) that I have totally ignored my music career, fledgling as it is. It used to be I'd have a weekly task list full of all these things that I did daily that I hoped would propel me forward, get me new fans and cd sales, and get me further along the path where I needed to be. I easily spent 20 hours a week just working on music related stuff. Well, every since the devestating disappointment of my last show I've just felt like all of my work has been in vain and I just kind of lost steam. I know, I know ... everyone has a bad turnout every now and then, it's not the end of the world, but it was just the timing of it along with everything else that was going on in my life ... I needed a break from it.

So, I took it. But now, after Friday night, I think I'm ready to get back to it. Every year, my friend Dawnyelle produces a variety show. She's a choreographer (she's the sexy modeling chick in my music video "Art") so the show is heavily dance based, but she brings in fashion, poetry and music as well. Every year she brings me in to perform a song. So, Friday night I went in and sang "I Luv Everything About U" from my DEVIANT CD. It was a no frills and no fuss performance and, for me, very low key. Well, much to my disbelief, I sold out of my CDs that night! Granted I only brought 7 with me because I only expected to sell 1 CD, if that, going by previous years' results, but I actually sold not only all 7 cds but a T- shirt, too! While 7 cds may not seem like a lot, it's the most I've ever sold at one time. I didn't even sell 7 cds at my own frigging CD release show that I worked my ass off for way back in January (I think I sold 5 cds and loads more shirts than anything). So, that was kind of a big deal.

So, I think it was kind of what I needed to get my head back in the game. I haven't worked this hard and come this far to stop now. This week I head to the Outmusic Awards in Chicago. It's a great networking event and I know I'll have a blast. Then, next weekend I have my performance at Baltimore Pride to look forward to. There won't be any shows for a while after that, though, because I'll be rehearsing for Shakespeare's "The Merry Wives of Windsor" and whenever you do theatre you have zero time for anything else. It's a time killer.

So, I'm glad I'll be busy. It'll be a switcheroo so I can get my mind in the game and off my fucking heart.

"I'm just trying 2 be me, doing what I got 2 do." - Brandy, Sittin' on Top of the World